The Top Ten Tactics for Totally Effective Moms

By Natalie Gahrmann
Success Coach/Author/Speaker

Being a mom is one of the most important endeavors of women who are mothers. Some times will be challenging and others will be rewarding. Here's a list which will help you be the best mom you can. It contains tips for helping you raise children and prepare them for the world without sacrificing yourself in the process.

1. CREATE TIME FOR YOURSELF

Budget time daily so you can find at least 30 minutes to do something that absolutely lifts your spirit. If you feel good, other areas of your life will also get a lift. Otherwise, how can you give to others when there's nothing left of you to give?

2. ENJOY 'QUALITY' TIME WITH YOUR CHILDREN

Offer 100% of yourself for a given time period and you'll probably be amazed at how much your children respond to you because you've taken the time. During this time do something fun with your children, e.g., read to them, play a game, take a walk, bake a cake, create a project, etc. (depending on their interests and age). Children need this kind of interaction with special adults in their life.

3. OFFER POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT

Promote positive behavior by observing and acknowledging it immediately. Rather than focusing on the negative exchanges with your children and feeling lousy about it, follow the old saying and "catch them doing something right." Then, let them know it by offering praise.

4. GATHER YOURSELF BEFORE LOSING CONTROL

Rather than blowing your stack when things go haywire, step away briefly if you can to regain control and put things in perspective. When you're able to distance yourself, even just for a moment, you will allow yourself to respond to the incident rather than react to it. Responding allows you, rather than your emotions, to be in control. Try it and you'll undoubtedly notice a difference!

5. PROMOTE LANGUAGE SKILLS FROM AN EARLY AGE

Few would disagree, baby talk is cute and children respond to it, however, they rarely learn from it. Prod your children to have a rich vocabulary from an early age by speaking to them intelligently rather than using cuteness. This will gently coerce your child into pulling his/her own vocabulary along and using correct pronunciation and labels for items.

6. CREATE TRADITIONS

Think back to your own childhood and what you remember most during growing up. Begin by trying to remember something your mom did that you really enjoyed or that made you feel special. Re-create that special memory with your own children. If traditions can be started at the same time, go for it! Traditions are cherished throughout a lifetime.

7. BE A ROLE MODEL FOR YOUR CHILDREN

Your actions speak louder than your words but your words make an impact, too. By being kind and charitable when discussing others your children will begin to learn the importance of respecting other people rather than judging or criticizing them. Also, avoid the use of profanity - they pick up on it quickly! Make your values clear in your actions. Remember, children mirror your behavior.

8. TEACH YOUR CHILDREN WHAT YOU VALUE

Children taught from an early age about the importance of prayer, money management, life virtues, etiquette, manners, respecting other's feelings, the importance of physical activity and exercise, sharing, expressing gratitude, etc. will often carry these attributes throughout their life. Begin teaching your children early on and continue reinforcing throughout daily life so they learn from you rather than their peers and other outside influences.

9. ENCOURAGE EARLY EXPLORATION

By providing your children with opportunities to experience various sports/hobbies/interests they can learn what they enjoy and what they excel at. There is a balance here, though; over-scheduling your children is not only exhausting for you, but also for them. Rather than scheduling every free minute to be involved in a particular activity, select a few together and experiment to see which are pleasurable. Be involved and interested in their activities.

10. DEMONSTRATE UNITY AND CONSISTENCY

If you are married, it's important to your children that you demonstrate respect for one another. There are times when you won't agree on certain parenting issues because background differences, priorities, beliefs, and your own rearing will dictate how you feel and react to various situations. An important key here is to be consistent yet flexible on matters that rank lower in importance (regardless of whether or not you are married).

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